


Insomnia Falls

by ThatScottishShipper



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Don’t post to another site, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hurt Shiro (Voltron), Insomnia, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Shiro (Voltron) Angst, Shiro (Voltron) Has Anxiety, Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Shiro (Voltron) Needs a Hug, Shiro (Voltron)-centric, Sick Shiro (Voltron), Sleep Deprivation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 20:08:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17107304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatScottishShipper/pseuds/ThatScottishShipper
Summary: Shiro struggles with insomnia due to his health problems. Keith is on hand to help.





	Insomnia Falls

Insomnia hit hard.

Takashi Shirogane barely managed after the first sleepless night, but as a quality sleep continued to be as elusive as scaultrite, he truly felt it. One or two hours sleep every night or so did little to combat the less than pleasant side effects that came with insomnia and his own debilitating illness.

 

The fogginess. Shiro  _ hated _ that most. As a Paladin, he strived to be a solid member of the team, especially when times of trouble arrived as they often did. Nothing embarrassed Shiro more than names he  _ should _ remember escaping him, or that fear of forgetting something crucial.

Like his Paladin helmet, or his bayard.

Sometimes, Shiro joked to himself that his own head would be a relic of the past if it wasn’t attached to his body. His greatest source of shame was his loss of focus during a battle, one that could have cost them dearly and he never forgave himself for.

Shiro knew where that bayard belonged when the compartment opened, but he simply stared, his muddled mind unable to keep up with this fast paced height of battle.

It was all thanks to Keith and the blazing sword that the Paladins pulled through, but Shiro could scarcely face his friends, humiliated that for such a young man, his sharp mind became a dull, thick cloud that no comprehension could penetrate.

It was  _ mortifying _ .

  
  


Next, suffocating exhaustion that absorbed his very emotions. Shiro tried to stay positive, he really did, but the tag-team of crippling muscular and nerve pain invisible to others and the sleeplessness took its toll eventually.

“I'm fine,” Shiro insisted with a smile that never quite reached his eyes. Even his laughs felt hollow, like it was something he was required to do in certain social situations whether he felt like it or not.

Sooner or later, the very enjoyment he found in things he loved diminished greatly. He still gave it his all, especially if they were team efforts like Monsters & Mana and he wanted to make the friends he called family happy.

But things that he once loved became a chore, something that required the greatest effort to accomplish.

If only there was a spell for sleep, or to numb the tension for a time, he joked bitterly to no one.

  
  


As if on cue, the irritability. This was the bane that caused him the most guilt, enduring every day without passing a bitter joke, spitting of a cutting remark, or worst of all, fighting the urge to unleash his verbal frustration on something… or somebody.

All work and no rest had the potential to drive anyone to breaking point, and Shiro already carried more baggage than most. Still, his harsh sighs and sharp tuts at, say, Coran’s overblown theatrics or Lance’s overexcitable nature were sometimes followed by an apologetic gaze.

Sometimes.

Every little sound set him on edge, from the modest sounds of Pidge tapping at her monitor to  _ questions, questions, stop asking questions, don't talk to me, I can’t think - _

Shiro had to focus, had to pay attention, but his already low threshold for sensory overload after being in Galra captivity and torture for a year made it too difficult. Regardless of how fatigued he was, Shiro buzzed with a nervous energy, itching to unleash at the slightest provocation, and he hated that negativity.

One question later, and Shiro needed to leave.

_ Heh, so much for patience yields focus _ , Shiro laughed emptily, staring vacantly into a nearby mirror. Dark rings under his eyes and a bleary gaze greeted him, and he wondered if he looked as bad as he felt to the others.

 

Then the guilt. For not being stronger, for feeling like this plague consumed him because he was doing something wrong, and his friends bore the brunt of it, and he was a burden -

A shudder seized his chest, and he blinked away the tears. He clutched the wall before him, doubled over from the familiar weakness and pain crawling through him from the legs up.

 

Suddenly, the door behind him opened, Shiro turned and there stood Keith, his normally stern face softened with concern. Only Keith understood how deeply Shiro struggled to maintain normality when his very body rebelled against him.

Only Keith saw Shiro fight an unseen battle each and every day, and still admired his resolve, even when things were difficult.

The love in those dark eyes latched on to Shiro’s vulnerability and he smiled sadly, choking back a sob. He trusted Keith enough to open his heart to him,  knowing his Paladin soul mate understood without words, but Shiro was unable to help himself.

He had been without quality sleep for much too long, every nerve frazzled and somehow drained at the same time.

“...I just want to sleep, Keith…”

 

Without a word, Keith took his hand and led Shiro to a nearby technology room, bursting to the brim with Pidge’s various equipment she tinkered with during their time in space.

He gave his dear friend a soft look before breaking away to the nearest control pad. Shiro was too tired to make sense of what Keith was doing, barely keeping up with Keith’s tapping.

Shiro blinked long and hard, trying to refresh his heavy eyes.

When he opened them again, Shiro was floating. It took him a good moment to process what Keith had done for him. As the Paladin drifted over to him, Shiro’s eyes widened.

Keith turned on the gravity for him.

 

The weight was finally off his throbbing limbs, allowing him temporary respite from the strain of standing. Before Shiro could thank Keith, the younger man came in close, nestling tired man’s chest, tucking his arms like a cat in a comfy spot.

Shiro, drifting on his back, secured his aching arms around Keith, embracing him. The warmth from Keith also enabled a sense of calm, melting away that earlier irritation and distress into a gentle ember, glowing in his chest.

As they slowly danced in the air, Shiro sighed blissfully, slowly closing his eyes to the perfect sight of Keith in his arms, finally lulled into a soothing sleep.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is a "Shiro is still ill" story that was inspired by my own experiences. I have a chronic pain condition, a permanent one, and sometimes, like the story says, insomnia hits hard. I channeled my own emotional and physical experiences with physical health problems through Shiro, who is a big source of inspiration to me.
> 
> I wrote this during a really bad bout with insomnia caused by pain, so it was a therapeutic outlet for me. Sharing the sorts of horrid side effects that come from complete lack of sleep and long term pain were the focus here, as well as Keith's support for him.
> 
> The gravity scene was a cute little moment that gives Shiro and Keith a quiet spell of togetherness and peace.
> 
> Thank you very much for reading and I hope you enjoy it. May I get some proper sleep soon. <3


End file.
